Thursday, November 10, 2011

Sometimes you need to hold on for a moment and sort what you have discovered – take a second to digest the relevant fragments. To reframe the big picture. To see clearly what has changed and how the process of thinking and doing has inevitably changed you. Reflection and stocktaking of oneself.

It is a perfect time, now, at the end of the year. So here is my plan: I will review the territory I’ve crossed during my life and put all the pieces together. I will examine wether that "belief", "emotion", or "memory" serves as a healthy instrument in my life. If not then it must be replaced or dug out! This will be my »spiritual atlas«. I know it will take some time to do this but healing across all territories of your heart takes time!

The reason I post this today instead of a pretty photo is I want you to see all sides of me.

I tend to only share fun adventures and inspiration, because frankly that comes easy to me and its my way of sharing. But I also believe in sharing in each others struggles and pain. So Im saying I am just like you with similar insecurities, fears, and failures. I want you to know you my friend are not alone and im not going to pretend im perfect and you are the strange being who is flawed. Please understand my motives here.

Iv been meeting with this lovely lady I know and we have shared our hearts on how many of our friends have missed the mark when it comes to loving each other and the world.

"if you want to love me well, show me your bumps, your bruises and fumbling and I will show you mine."

"if you want to love me well lets spend time together celebrating, laughing and noticing life's beauties."

I will not have one without the other.

I'm tired of us all only accepting the good. which I have fallen guilty to many many times!

So as well as sharing this for you to know your not alone this is also my apology and my forgiveness. Lets start over. Lets live life differently. Lets revisit our hearts and find whats true and lovely and lets cling to that together.

What if there is nothing wrong with being vulnerable?

What if there is nothing wrong with being flawed?

What if when I am weak "He" truly is strong?

What if we dare to open up all the closed places and shed light onto them instead of continuing to hide?


Anonymous said...

:) proud of you my girl! keep this entry at the forefront of your mind! there is so much for you to love, live, and experience!

michellemalpaya said...

you are a beautiful soul. I love your posts.