Tuesday, May 15, 2012

This sky is a creamy ash,
 releasing bits of rain
nourishing the plants
and dazzling on my skin.
everything looks more pure in its light,
from the green of the foliage to the golden petals.

Reading and musing about grief:
(Grief reshaped my life.)
Some days I experienced all the stages of grief at once, 
while other days I felt nothing at all, complete void. 
Grief consumes us and then spits us back out, burning through our old life to make room for the new reality. We measure time as if your life depends on it, gauging how far from the event we are in order to evaluate our progress.  I still find myself counting the months.
We feel pain because we loved them, because we miss them. 
Because we want them back; but it's possible to get trapped in the denial, to reject what happened,
 to put on a brave face for others and say were doing fine. 
You don't "get over" grief- you move through it as you learn to live with the loss.
You see, when something bad happens that's big enough to make you question your entire life,

all the other hurts that are hanging around, all the wounds you've collected during your lifetime, will come out of the shadows and ask to be healed too.

(Life is one long tangle of days.)

We do not choose grief, but in many ways it is the most extraordinary journey we will ever take.
We do survive and then we THRIVE...
-Susannah Conway

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